Friday, June 26, 2009

The Big Change

Well, if you haven't heard already or didn't watch Monday night's episode of John and Kate Plus 8, J&K have decided to divorce. According to the show, the legal proceedings were to begin on Monday, June 22, to "dissolve" their 10 year marriage.

I was hoping the "Big Change" was going to be that they were quitting the show to work on their marriage. I was hopeful. I hate hearing news of marriage break-ups. We get enough of it from the Hollywood scene, but more recently, I've known a lot of people personally and through friends that are calling it quits--some only after 6 months of marriage. It breaks my heart.

**Marriage is tough; and we don't really ever hear the whole story of why a marriage breaks up, so I don't want to pass judgment or make anyone feel guilty if they are divorced--I know several people that divorced or have divorced parents whom I love and care about deeply!**

Monday's episode made me want to work so much harder on my marriage to Bob. Kate said she never expected to be where they are today--I'm sure no one ever expects to get a divorce.

I don't want to wake up one day and wonder what happened--I want to work to keep our marriage alive. I know tough times will come and those times will cause strain, but I don't even want to think of divorce as an option--b/c it's not an option. I took a vow before God Almighty that I would stay married to Bob until death (I'm praying the rapture happens 1st, though! hehe)

"Marriage is the hardest thing you will ever do.
The secret is removing divorce as
an option. Anybody who gives themselves that option will get a divorce.
-Will Smith

One of the blogs I enjoy following is Domestic Felicity. She is an incredible writer and always has such a positive view on life. One of her recent posts was about how spouses should challenge each other to improve and work on areas that "have previously been neglected." Tikkun midot is the Hebrew term she used in her post, which "can be roughly translated as working on one's character." It was an inspiring post for me to read! You can read the entire post here.

"Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate."

~Barnett R. Brickner

I love my husband more each day. I'm so thankful to be his wife! I know there are times when I'm lazy in our marriage, whether it be slacking on the housework or not putting in the effort to talk about his day or what's on his mind. But he's worth it--we're worth. For God's glory.

"So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate."

Matthew 19:6


  1. Such a great post Kari. I think its so so sad for ALL those kids of thier's to endure such a trial in life. Makes my heart break as well. As I am a teacher, I often see many divorces and its just fills my eyes with tears for the children involved. My parents divorced when I was very young and I didnt exactely "feel: the consequences of it all, but as I grew up I began to say that the word "divorce" is not in my vocabulary...and it still isnt. Ryan and I have been through tough times before, but its in those times following the hardship that you become even more in love and stronger as a couple. Anyways...just a few thoughts of mine! I totally agree with you! Marriage is sacred!

  2. Yeah, I was disappointed, also! I haven't got to watch it in months, so it will be weird watching it now!!!
    You have a beautiful family! =)

  3. As you know, I'm so sad about the J&K divorce news. I guess it proves that fame & fortune don't always insure a perfect life.

    Hey, I would love to have a copy of the picture of the three of you to frame!


  4. I have never watched J&K +8. I know I am like th eonly person in America who hasn't. But I was still heart broken to hear that they were getting a divorce.
    I completely agree that we should work daily on marriage. Its not easy putting two people under one household with entirely different backgrounds. But I love marriage. It's a covenant between two people. A covenant is a solemn binding agreement, it should not be broken.

  5. haha..i just realized after i submitted that, that i explained what a covenant was, like you don't know. haha...sorry. I was just reinterating how it should be broken. :-)

  6. Sorry again...HOW IT SHOULD NNOOOTTT be broken. I just better get off her...

  7. "The secret is removing divorce as an option. Anybody who gives themselves that option will get a divorce."

    This is one of the things Matt and I talked alot about before we got married... it breaks my heart to hear or families that get in a arquement - and throw out that word! We made a vow that the word "divorce" is not to be spoken in our home! Especially out of anger!


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